It's over! These words might not sound soothing to the ears of couples or anyone in love,actually they might hate these two words, but it's music to the ears of others like me. My relationship ended, you people must've guessed it by now, it's not like I wanted for it to end but when the relationship suffocates you, this is what you want. Nothing else in the world can sound better than these two words. When the relationship suffocates you, you really don't want to live.
It's ironic that the name of the blog is 'Something to Write' and today I have a whole lot to say but I don't want to say anything today. I really don't get it! How can something so lovely, so blissful turn into something so full of hatred. Maybe it was me and I am not afraid to take all the blame, I accept it with all consequences. Actually I really want to take the blame for it so that this hateful thing comes to an END. But I really want to point something out, you can't clap with one hand. If I've been the reason for this, you also have been a reason for something. That's all I want to say to that person.
There's people who hurt you (knowingly or unknowingly) and there are people who help you in these times. Even though I was glad that this was over, I didn't feel any kind of a heartbreak, maybe because I wanted it because of the suffocation in this so called 'loving relationship'. Even though I wasn't feeling low, my friends wanted to make sure that I was OK and that's the thing I love about them, they will be there, no matter how cranky I get or whatever I do. The only one thing I treasure more than this God Forsaken Relationship is my FRIENDS. I don't know if they think of me like that but I know one thing for sure is that I love them. Maybe all this hatred has made me value my friends more and I certainly don't want to be the one who looses them.
You people might think that I'm drunk. I wish I was but unfortunately I'm not, maybe I'm just overwhelmed by seeing the contrasting natures of the one's I loved and the ones I cherish, that they are in my life. Or maybe I just realised that the whole fault was mine for getting rid of this suffocating relationship and hurting the one I once thought that I loved.
You know what, whatever, I can learn to live with the decisions I've made. I'm a grown ass man and I can handle my life, even if it's full of mistakes. Hell, everyone makes mistakes, but it takes a really emotionally strong heart to accept those mistakes and live with them for the rest of your life.
So! I want to take this time out and apologise to the people I've hurt maybe for the right or wrong reasons and I'm thankful to a handful of people who've been with me all this time, help me and managed to stick with me.
Nearing the end I just feel free that I've let it all out,actually the most of it, not all, I'm not happy that I feel this way but I'm really calm now and maybe I should thank that person for teaching me a very important lesson in life, if it's not too rude to thank her.
Love is a really beautiful feeling to have and I've felt it two times to be honest. It's a feeling I would've loved to keep my whole life. It just feels that the world doesn't matter any more and the person in front of you is your world. It's a feeling that completely changes you, for better or for worse, but it surely does. For me the first few weeks of this relationship were the best, no worries, no problems, absolutely nothing to worry about.
Then comes the dreaded talk about what will happen in the future? Will we be ready to take the big step? Frankly among the both of us I was the one who was worried about this future talk. Maybe it's a "guy thing" to worry about the future talk. For me there were a lot of things that I had to consider before committing to that sort of thing. She always said let's face the future when it comes, for now let's enjoy the present. I mean 'come on', I didn't have to be a genius to figure out that she wanted it too and she wanted it now. Is it wrong to ask for some time to think? But when it starts bugging you, you freak out and want to end this relationship. At that exact point everything just breaks apart, you start to think about everything that has went wrong with this relationship, all the hate starts to surface and that's when you find out if you truly loved your partner or if they truly loved you or was it just a ruse. For me it was a very hurtful revelation and that too a very ugly one at that. This relationship managed to make me emotionally exhausted and now the best I can do is smile in front of my friends at everything they say.
Then comes the dreaded talk about what will happen in the future? Will we be ready to take the big step? Frankly among the both of us I was the one who was worried about this future talk. Maybe it's a "guy thing" to worry about the future talk. For me there were a lot of things that I had to consider before committing to that sort of thing. She always said let's face the future when it comes, for now let's enjoy the present. I mean 'come on', I didn't have to be a genius to figure out that she wanted it too and she wanted it now. Is it wrong to ask for some time to think? But when it starts bugging you, you freak out and want to end this relationship. At that exact point everything just breaks apart, you start to think about everything that has went wrong with this relationship, all the hate starts to surface and that's when you find out if you truly loved your partner or if they truly loved you or was it just a ruse. For me it was a very hurtful revelation and that too a very ugly one at that. This relationship managed to make me emotionally exhausted and now the best I can do is smile in front of my friends at everything they say.
It's ironic that the name of the blog is 'Something to Write' and today I have a whole lot to say but I don't want to say anything today. I really don't get it! How can something so lovely, so blissful turn into something so full of hatred. Maybe it was me and I am not afraid to take all the blame, I accept it with all consequences. Actually I really want to take the blame for it so that this hateful thing comes to an END. But I really want to point something out, you can't clap with one hand. If I've been the reason for this, you also have been a reason for something. That's all I want to say to that person.
There's people who hurt you (knowingly or unknowingly) and there are people who help you in these times. Even though I was glad that this was over, I didn't feel any kind of a heartbreak, maybe because I wanted it because of the suffocation in this so called 'loving relationship'. Even though I wasn't feeling low, my friends wanted to make sure that I was OK and that's the thing I love about them, they will be there, no matter how cranky I get or whatever I do. The only one thing I treasure more than this God Forsaken Relationship is my FRIENDS. I don't know if they think of me like that but I know one thing for sure is that I love them. Maybe all this hatred has made me value my friends more and I certainly don't want to be the one who looses them.
You people might think that I'm drunk. I wish I was but unfortunately I'm not, maybe I'm just overwhelmed by seeing the contrasting natures of the one's I loved and the ones I cherish, that they are in my life. Or maybe I just realised that the whole fault was mine for getting rid of this suffocating relationship and hurting the one I once thought that I loved.
You know what, whatever, I can learn to live with the decisions I've made. I'm a grown ass man and I can handle my life, even if it's full of mistakes. Hell, everyone makes mistakes, but it takes a really emotionally strong heart to accept those mistakes and live with them for the rest of your life.
So! I want to take this time out and apologise to the people I've hurt maybe for the right or wrong reasons and I'm thankful to a handful of people who've been with me all this time, help me and managed to stick with me.
Nearing the end I just feel free that I've let it all out,actually the most of it, not all, I'm not happy that I feel this way but I'm really calm now and maybe I should thank that person for teaching me a very important lesson in life, if it's not too rude to thank her.
"You May Fall in Love, But be sure that this is the Person you want to Fall in Love With"
Gud bro nice
ReplyDeleteGud bro nice
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